Lady and the Tramp Remake is Pointless and Obnoxious

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Disney's vault of animated films are widely renowned classics of a bygone era where children's movies were thought provoking and fun for the whole family. Live action remakes of these classics are shambling hollow shells of what they once were, and Disney's live action remake of Lady and the Tramp is no different.

The real-life dogs used in the film are instantly transformed into horrific monsters dwelling in the depths of the uncanny valley the moment they open their bizarre CGI mouths and begin to speak, and the cats who frame poor Lady for demolishing her family's home are a hideous pair. The original music is left unscathed, save for the controversial Siamese cat song from the 1955 animated version which is replaced with a terrible jazz song that fails to blend in alongside the rest of the film's musical number.

In every way imaginable, Lady and the Tramp (2019) lacks subtlety. From the way the pair of cats demolish every inch and corner of Lady's home, to the way its humor often devolves into slapstick accompanied by plenty of over-the-top yelling, this movie wants you to remember that you're watching a children's film. Its over-the-top nature stretches into a fake-out death scene where it attempts to convince its audience of children that Tramp is definitely absolutely dead, before he makes some goofy remark and smiles his disgusting CGI smile.

Most of the film repeats itself in an effort to pad its 104 minute run-time, which is much too long when compared to the original's run-time of 76 minutes. The remake offers no new plot beats, and it follows the formula of the original almost exactly. So, the director padded the run-time with a lengthy chase sequence and characters spending a whole lot of time repeating themselves. Some phrases you'll hear over and over include "baby moves in, dog moves out" and "I can be who I want", because Lady and the Tramp (2019) assumes that children need to be constantly reminded of a character's fears and motivations, even though no one really took issue with the original movie (except for the racism, I mean).

If you were looking forward to this remake, for whatever reason, then I'm sorry to say you're probably going to be disappointed. It's visually unappealing, dull, loud, and yet another failure in Disney's efforts at remaking their animated movies as live-action films.

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