Netflix's Enola Holmes (2020) is Condescending and Dull

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(The following review is spoiler-free!)

"Enola is alone backwards," our protagonist tells us in one of her many monologues. She tells us many things - how she's feeling, what she's thinking, where she thinks she should go next. Her wide gaze is disconcerting and her sunny disposition grating. This isn't Sherlock Holmes, this is Millie Bobby Brown and Henry Cavill playing dress-up.

Everything about Netflix's newest release is grating. Its mystery begs us to care for cartoonish characters who speak to us as if we're watching an episode of Dora the Explorer. Showing rather than telling is thrown to the wayside in favor of constant fourth wall breaks to beat your sense of immersion into a bloody pulp. Enola Holmes wants you to know that you're watching a movie, and that it's the funniest, wittiest, and most important movie you're ever going to see (unfortunately, in light of recent events that very well may be true).

From its fast-paced editing to its jaunty soundtrack (which sounds remarkably like royalty free music that would be more at home in a YouTube video), Enola Holmes is constantly begging you to be endeared. Scrabble tiles rapidly swap places as Enola solves puzzles, inviting you to take a glimpse into the brilliance of her mind rather than simply opting for decent writing.

Sherlock, described as tall, thin, with thin lips and a hawk-like nose, is played by Henry Cavill in some of the strangest casting I've seen for the role. Cavill's performance makes it hard to believe he's portraying the famous detective (but don't worry, Millie Bobby Brown will look straight into the camera multiple times and tell you about how smart and dashing her brother is!).

From its plot to its score, casting, and acting, every angle of Enola Holmes falls flat. Unfortunately, we don't get to see new good movies in 2020, so this is what we're getting.

Enola Holmes is available for streaming on Netflix.

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